Wednesday, December 26, 2007

better days.

With it being the holiday season and all we here at making it rain have decided to review the best holidays in any given year. This will help you in that it will show you when and how it is best to demonstrate your mad cash flow.

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#365-
Your birthday. You do not spend money on your birthday. All of those money hungry friends and leaches pay for your drinks on this night. With all of the loot you have foolishly wasted on their drug habits over the past year it is the very least those ungrateful peons can do for you.
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#281-
New Year's Eve. It is fucking amateur hour out there. Everybody is looking to have the perfect kiss when the clock strikes twelve. Well, let those wieners who want to be in love have that night. The only thing that is perfect about meeting a woman with me is when she is walking out the door after blowing me.

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#280-
Valentine's Day.
hahahahahahahahhaahahahahahah. yeah right. See i know what you were thinking. You would think that we would be all about that shit, right? wrong. Whereas we appreciate wiping out asses with money, burning it at our leisure, and drinking to the point that we black out, puke, then buy more drinks, we can not in any way condone showering one woman with gifts on this holiday. If you would like to show them the condoms that you just bought that look like one hundred dollar bills though, well, that is okay.

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#69-
Any shorty's birthday. You find the hottest babe in the place and you make her yours. You take out your bill fold (or wallet, whichever you prefer) and you drop that wad of $100 bills right in front of her shorty face. She will be all like "OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU ARE LIKE SOOOOO HOT, LOL!!!! WHAT IS YOUR NUMBER!?!?!?! LETS TEXT!!!!" Then you will be like, "awesome, i am going to buy this girl and all of her friends so many drinks that i might be able to sleep with all fifteen of them."

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