Song Profile.

The Song "Love In The Club" by Usher featuring Young Jeezy currently sits atop the Billboard hot 100 charts. We here at making it rain are going to analyze the lyrics to determine if this song rules.



I do it for the ladies
I gotta keep it hood
Where we at Polo? ('EY)
I see you right
Yo Keith You was right
We just gettin started
YEAHHHHHH MAN

Well this is hardly the auspicious start that I had hoped for....



You say you searching for somebody
That'll take you out and do you right
Well come here baby and let daddy show you what it feel like
You know all you gotta do is tell me what you sippin' on (sippin on sippin on) (ey)
And I promise that I’m gonna keep it comin’ all night long
Lookin’ in your eyes while you on the other side
And I think miss shorty I’ve got a thing for you
Doin’ it on purpose Windin and workin’ it
I can tell by the way you lookin’ at me girl

Alright now this is alright. Talking about buying a shorty drinks ALL night long, getting her real drunk and then it sounds like he is going to do her super hard. This verse is is approved by MakingItRain.




I wanna make love in this club 'ey (in this club 'ey in this club 'ey)
I wanna make love in this club 'ey (in this club 'ey in this club 'ey)

Well, my feelings are that he should be saying "I want to do your right now in this club" but I guess that some ladies don't like being spoken to like that. oh well.



(Listen) Got some friends rollin’ wit you baby then thats cool (thats cool, thats cool)
You can leave em wit my niggaz let em know that I got you (got u, got u)
If you didn’t know, you’re the only thing that’s on my mind (my mind, my mind)
Cos the way you staring miss you got me wantin to give it to you all night
Lookin’ in your eyes while you on the other side
I cant take it no more baby im comin for(editors note: this should say on, not in, don't you think?) you
You keep doin’ it on purpose whindin and workin’ it
If we close our eyes it could be just me and you

I like his thinking here. Usher is a nice dude. In fact he is a lot like me. How? Well, since you are asking let me tell you. Like myself, Usher has tons of babes wanting to do him all of the time. Like Usher, I often times pass some of my extra babes off to my friends. The woman aren't as pleased but my friends couldn't be happier. And that is what nice dudes like Usher and I do for our friends.




I wanna make love in this club 'ey (in this club 'ey in this club 'ey)
I wanna make love in this club 'ey (in this club 'ey in this club 'ey)
I wanna make love in this club 'ey (in this club 'ey in this club 'ey)
I wanna make love in this club 'ey (in this club 'ey in this club 'ey)


I have already made my feelings on this part pretty clear. Here is a hot babe




POLO YOU A FOOL FOR THIS ONE HOMIE
IM ON EM, YEAHHHH
LETS GO!!
I’m what you want, I’m what you need
He got you trapped, I’ll set you free
Sexually, mentally, physically, emotionally
I’ll be like your medicine, you’ll take every dose of me
It’s going down on isle 3. I’ll bag you like some groceries
And every time you think about it you gon’ want some more of me
Bout to hit the club, make a movie yeah rated R
Pulled up like a trap star, thats if you had
(in the car) Have you ever made love to a thug in the club with his sights on?
87 Jeans and a fresh pair of Nikes on
On the couch, on the table, on the bar, or on the floor
You can meet me in the bathroom yeah you know I’m tryna go


hehehehe. Young Jeezy is awesome! I love rap music.



Might as well give me a kiss, if we keep touchin like this
i know you scared baby, They dont know what we doin
Lets both get undressed right here, keep it up girl i swear, imma give it to you non stop
and i dont care, who's watchin...watchin...watchin
(watchin watchin...ohhhh...in this club, on the floor, baby's just makin love)
I wanna make love in this club 'ey (in this club 'ey in this club 'ey)
I wanna make love in this club 'ey (in this club 'ey in this club 'ey)
(lovin in...lovin in this club. 'eyyy...yea...ey..ey..love...in the club..in the club, ur the one, can u freak me babe?)


I think that is is spectacular that the children of today can listen to this on the radio. This is going to influience all 13 year old girls to become whores and all 13 year old boys to become total ballers who love doing whores. America, I like the way you are looking. MakingItRain has decided that this song is more than tolerable. Nice job Usher and Young Jeezy.

Aren't You Glad We Didn't Go To High School Here?

BOR-RING!!!!!






This immediately becomes reason number 46 that I am glad I did not grow up in Waterloo. Right in between reason number 45, no hot chicks and number 47, fiscal responsibility. Reason number 1, naturally, is that I hear that the Mountie's up there are known to give up to three dwi's to drivers in one night! Good thing Hayley doesn't live up there!

St. Patrick's Day.

On days like today ballers like the writers here at MakingItRain have a tendencey to sort of take the day off. We feel as if the act of rain making is better left to professionals like ourselves. When you have amateur rain makers out there things can get a little dangerous.



Yesterday was the annual St. Patricks Day Parade in Buffalo, New York. This event will usually bring out anywhere from 75,000 to 100,000 people according to the Buffalo News. Which is pretty much the entire population of Buffalo. Drinking generally commences around 9am and goes from anywhere to 10am to 7am the next day. Generally, I would give a 21 hour drinking binge two thumbs up. Think of all of the money you would have to spend drinking that much. Plus I am not even sure someone could drink for that long so the odds are they took a break around Midnight to score a babe or two. Again, I would refer to those actions as totally sweet.



There is one shorty though who might have to take the honors for the most crazy bitch in the greater Buffalo area from the St. Patty's day holiday. Mind you, we do not condone the actions of this woman but shiiiiiiiiiit you have gotta be some kind of bad ass to get away with this.

http://www.buffalonews.com/258/story/301538.html



She got two dwi's in one night. First off, I want to state that in no way do we condone drunk driving. When you have as much scratch as us you can afford to take a limo wherever you want. It is not a big deal. Now that we have that out of the way, HOLY FUCKING SHIT!!!!! I mean, how do you even do that? Don't they send you to jail after your first one? So after she gets her first DWI she goes to pick up her boyfriend and the two of them break into her boyfriends mother's house!?!? That is crazy. I mean, I guess that if you are drunk enough to break into your possible one day mother in law's house and you are driving that you may deserve a DWI, but, man, this is just too funny.



So here is to you Hayley Love, I hope that your lawyers can roll these two charges into one. Think of it like when you get a parking ticket. You should have just left that DWI ticket on your windshield then maybe you would have only gotten one.

ballah hollah

In case you haven't noticed we really like to talk about ourselves. It's hard not to, though, when your doing amazing shit nearly every minute of the day. Well here at making it rain, we occasionally will take time out of our awesome lives to acknowledge others that live up to our standards.
The first would be a man that I can personally vouch for as being a total bad ass. A couple of weeks back at some party, after pounding two malt liquor 40s, I was given the propers by some dude for my achievement. He then suggested we celebrate by shotgunning deuce-deuces of Camo. It was then I realized that this was no ordinary party goer...it was none other than C-REX. While everyone else in the party was sipping on their PBRs and Hamm's ironically we were out back recounting tales about how fucking cool we are. By now, you must know that much about me so I will present some evidence that, in fact, other ballers do exist. Just watch this video and see for yourself.



and if your still not convinced...go to this website

Okay, Okay...so your probably now convinced about how fucking cool the people we role with are but let me tell you a little story. Apparently, after getting paid ($2000) from a show he just finished, C REX then took that money (which he was supposed to use to go visit his girlfriend) and bought everyone in the venue drinks and then made a 40 sculpture of himself. With that said, I would like to induct C REX as an honorary member of Making it Rain.

Hating It Rain.

So remember that cool sociology 101 professor from your first year in college? The one who really opened up your eyes to all of the outrages going on in the world. The one who may or may not have influenced you to take up anthropology. Well there is little to no doubt in my mind that this professor had you read "Nickeled and Dimed: On(Not) Getting By In America" by Barbara Ehrenreich.



Barbara decided that for this book she was going to do some modern muckraking to prove that you can't get by with a shitty ass job. Starting off in her own backyard, Ehrenreich searched for lodging and a job in neighboring Key West, Florida. After Securing jobs at two restaurants, and a one-day housekeeping stint, she worked for one month before giving into the hard work of an extremely busy night at the restaurant; she walked out, then she headed to Portland, Maine, without an automobile, for a fresh start. Well, Barb, I bet it would be a lot easier to secure a stable living if you didn't walk out on your job when it got too hard, huh? Stupid Bitch.



After arriving in Maine, Ehrenreich landed two more jobs after a four day search, one as an assistant at a nursing home and another as a maid at a cleaning franchise. Worn down by her work-load and work-related stress, she traveled to her final destination, Minneapolis, Minnesota, where she is employed in the women's department at a Wal-Mart before ultimately ending her investigation. Even with the odds stacked on her side -- a car, no kids taking her dough, and a boat load of cash to start off with -- Ehrenreich failed to achieve a baller lifestyle. Though, I have to admit, the one thing not in her favor, quitting every job she has.



So where did all of this get you, Barb? See the thing is by forgoing your modest middle class means and trying to prove a point you wound up with no money looking like a fat ass Chuck Klosterman.



Are you happy with that decision? You are trying to glorify a lifestyle that is stupid. I think for your next book maybe you should write about what it is like to be homeless for a couple of months. I am sure people will love reading that. If you want to give me a signed copy of that when it is finished you can find me at the top of the best seller charts with my book "How to make a ton of cash and score a ton of ass"





*For the record, we don't disagree with her idea. I mean, who knows if those suckers with minimum wage jobs can pay their bills. At Making It Rain we decided early on that it was important to get high paying jobs so that we could have nice things, get drunk often and score tons of chicks. So far, so good.

With Tax Season Looming...

There are like a million old Money Inc. videos that will get posted on this site before all is said and done. Here is one half of the former 3 time WWF tag team champions, I.R.S. doling out some tax advice for all of you tax cheating schlubs out there.

Please Govenor, Please.

First and foremost I would like to state that this blog has no political affiliations what so ever. Each and every writer and making it rain comes from different backgrounds and have their own political beliefs that we hold true to ourselves but would never publicize here. Some of us hate high taxes because it takes spending money out of our pockets. On the other hand others here love high taxes because we like to show homeless people how much is deducted from our check every week.



Now, with that said, Elliot Spitzer, YOU ARE AWESOME!!!!!



Now I realize that dear old Elliot is not the first politician to have some mild indiscretions with the "ladies", nor do I believe that he will be the last. The fact is that he is the first to get busted since this blog has been in existence, so for that reason alone I feel as if he should be honored for getting down on some whores. I mean, look at this guy, He needs a whore. It's not like every guy can look like a making it rain writer.



Also, here is a picture of him with a woman. I assume that he paid for her to follow him and then felate him afterwards. Awesome, awesome, so very awesome.



Well Elliot, here is to you, first off for getting me to update twice in one day. Secondly for making me crack up super hard. Last but not least we here at making it rain want to thank you for letting us post a picture of this woman.




who may or not have been the prostitute that cost you your governorship. Idiot.

Office Parties.

A wise man once told me that there was no such thing as a bad party. Over the years I find myself inclined to agree with the old man. Sure, some parties have proved to be more fun than others. Some parties, if not for the presence of alcohol might have been god awful in fact, thankfully though, there is always free booze and often times free food. Whenever free food and free booze are around it is an excellent recipe for a baller to show off how much he can drink. This, more often than not, results in a good time had by all.



In my opinion though, there is one kind of party that stands out amongst all others. This is the work party. As most of you know, part of being a money mauler is giving up a good chunk of your day to the man. Slaving away, be it at a nine to five, an eight to six or maybe even a nine to nine if you are very ambitious. For the record, no real baller works the night shift, 'cos, y'know, that is when the sluts are out.



Now since you give most of your time to your boss it is only fair that when he presents the opportunity to drink away his cash, well, you should take advantage of this. It is recommended that you drink top shelf manhattans, do shots of patron with any good looking co-workers and if you are feeling especially wasteful, act like a girl and spill your drink while you are in the bathroom. This will create the illusion that you are drinking more than you actually are while still not costing you a penny. Talk about a win win situation!



Another awesome part about the night is that since you don't have to spend a penny on booze or food that you can tip the bartenders far much more than they deserve. You can tell them, "hey buddy, I used to tend bar in college, it will get better, look at all of this!!!! ahahahahaha!" The bartender will respect you and the shorties from your office will think that you are super cool too. Just be careful that you are impressing the hot, young women from a few cubicles down and not Agnus and Barb from accounting.



The Christmas party this year was awful man, ughh.

Battle of the Ballers.

Tonight is the series finale of the critically acclaimed HBO series The Wire. The show has received critical acclaim for its realistic portrayal of urban life and uncommonly deep exploration of sociological themes, and has been named the best show on television by TIME, Entertainment Weekly, The Guardian,the Chicago Tribune,Slate,the San Francisco Chronicle,Philadelphia Daily News and me. Despite the positive reviews, the show has failed to draw an audience commensurate with its press.



Most of the readers of this blog don't have the time do watch television, you are far to busy spending cash, getting wasted and doing chicks. I understand this but this show displays some baller ass shit such as slinging drugs and having mad cash. Plus a bunch off pussies get off'ed which is sweet. Today we are going to go over the two main ballers in this show, Marlo Stanfield and Avon Barksdale to figure out which of these ballers flaunts the most cheddar. First up, Avon Barksdale.



Avon was the number one baller when the show started in 2002. He ran all of West Baltimore and had no less than two people who testified against his crew murdered for being snitchin' ass bitches. Him and his boy Stringer Bell had the most cash and ran the most sexy strip club in all of B'more.



Avon was eventually locked up for conspiracy or some shit because that is all that they could put on his ass. The man was far too smooth to get locked up for murder. While he was in prison he had a bunch of other jokers killed because he was so bad ass he could make sweet ass plays like that from the slammer. Next up, Marlo Stanfield.



Marlo had over twenty punk asses shot up and put in some vacant buildings to show other dealers in B'more how he rolled. In the most recent season he totally went ape shit on his crew when he found out that his name was sullied by Omar (a homosexual stuck up boy) in the streets. We will find out tonight how many more "all talk no action" bitches get done for being snitches.



So let's break this thing down Dr. Jack Style

More bad ass crew?

Avon had Weebay, Stringer Bell, D'Angelo Barksdale, and Brodie.

Marlo runs with Chris Partlow, Snoop and Cheddar.

The winner is Marlo. Snoop and Chris kill the most jokers in all of B'more. Be they from the East side, West side or New York City, no one is safe on Marlo's watch.





The most cash flow

Avon relationship with his number two, Stringer Bell, was always in a state of constant flux because he felt restricted by Stringer's cash spending limitations placed upon him. Avon always wanted to go out and shoot corner boys, get drunk and spend cash like woah.

Marlo is kind of a bitch ass who only takes an administrative position when it comes to doing the deeds. He hands out cash to little kids in season four just so those kids know who is in charge with Avon in prison. Marlo also had Prop Joe launder money for him because he was such a bitch that he wouldn't just go out with the cash that he had. Ultimately, when push comes to shove Avon had Stinger killed because Avon wanted to flaunt cash and Stringer wasn't having it. Avon takes this round.



Who scores the most babes?

Marlo sort of strikes me as a prude, I don't really remember him even talking to any chick besides Snoop during the entire show. For all of the name calling on Omar I might have to wonder if it is time for someone to look into the mirror.

As mentioned earlier, Avon owned a strip club, 'nuff said.



In our battle of the ballers Avon Barksdale defeats Marlo Stanfield as the most ballin' ass n word on The Wire. My prediction for tonight's finale, given this head to head breakdown, is that Avon has Marlo killed. Sure Avon is in prison but he has shown that he can make a bitch drop from there already. Also, I swear to God if Bubbles dies I am going to get reaaaaaaaaal pissed.

I Can't Get Enough Of This Guy

I really do wish that I never found out that Ted Dibiase, The Million Dollar Man, was a fraud. It ruined just about my entire month of February. I have new hopes for March though. I am going to kind of pretend that it never happened and go back to posting awesome video clips from The Million Dollar Man. The Godfather of spending, I love him.