Making It Rain Readers Can Make It Rain, Too!

Reader Jay White featured on the front page of Lockport, NY newspaper The Union Sun and Journal. We here at making it rain are quite proud of you, Jason.

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I can't say that I am surprised. I am just happy that we are providing a service to Alaskan youth.

Making It Rain Convention Recap

As most everyone in the greater Portland area knows, the first annual Making It Rain Convention took place this past weekend. If I were to say a good time was had by all; well, I would be lying. Sure, all of the rain makers in the area did, but ugly bitches and bar hags did not!



Upon the Buffalo dudes arrival to the city or Portland, pounding commenced immediately. They writers of making it rain went the the finest wood paneled bar in the city and drank the finest North Western brews. After that we voyaged down to the finest strip club in the city. Would you believe that Portland is so hipster that at their strip clubs the bars play indie rock instead of rap? What kind of shit is that?



The worst part of that is that I am not even fucking around. They played the Shins instead of Fat Joe. I cannot make it clear enough how weird that shit is. I suppose those are the kind of lame ass hipsters you get in a city like Portland. Ugh.



And you wouldn't believed what the locals looked like. Well, let me tell you anyway- tards. They looked like tards. Then those tards had the nevre to call us uncultured. Then we stole their wallets and lit their money on fire. It was sweet.


*
**

What a fucking town.



*The video is not actually us. It is just a video of money being burnt. I didn't even watch the whole thing, I hope it is sweet.



**The video I had of us lighting that tards' money on fire was broken when I smacked it over his head repeatedly.

Future Baller.

"It is fun to do bad things"

Latarian Milton is one basdass dude. I think I might adopt him.




He's back. And guess what, he wants some chicken wings. Yeah, I think that he will be just fine in Buffalo.




And I will tell you what Latarian, I am not going to be taking you to any broke ass Wal-Mart, we are going to Target. It will be awesome.

Ice-T

As a little hustler this video had a very large impact on me. I am sure that you can see why.

Making It Rain Convention.

For almost a year now we here at making it rain have been blogging about spending cash, getting wasted and scoring babes. You, the readers, have allowed us to indulge ourselves in the best kind of story telling that there is, the awesome kind. So to thank all of you we are going to have our first annual Making It Rain convention!



That's right from the 29th of May until June 2nd each and every Making It Rain writer will be convening in Portland, Oregon to celebrate you, the readers of this fine website.



Activities will include, lighting cigarettes with $50 bills. Instructional fire extinguisher classes to help you prepare in the event that you burn too much money too quickly. Also we plan on getting totally shit faced. Like big time wasted. I mean non stop bender from Thursday to Tuesday. Also there is going to be no less that two hours a night dedicated solely to doing chicks. If you are not awesome at talking to ladies we can teach you how to score babes on Thursday, before it gets dark out, so you too can partake in the sexing.



So if you are interested in joining Mitch Little, Bob-A-Lob, Slim, Bone, P Money, Cakes, Dr. Sac, Ice and the rest of the crew you can hit us up at makingitrainwebsite@yahoo.com . We will tell you what parties we are attending, what bitches we are fucking and what bars we are going to be taking over. We look forward to seeing you out there. And remember, bring money, and lots of it. You are totally going to need it.



Hopefully we will see you, and a ton of sluts, there!

Old Baby Videos.

Most people have terribly embarrassing videos of them from when they are kids. As you can imagine, that does not apply to the writers here at making it rain. In fact, here is a video of me from when I am just a wee little lad at a minor league baseball game.



I have to admit, the idea of my dad styling my hair into a mohawk is kind of lame though.

The Derby.

As has been documented before, we here at making it rain are big fans of playing the ponies. It takes all of the best things in life and puts them into one, tiny, smoke filled room. It is something to behold.



Well, no one horse racing event epitomizes this lighting in a bottle of rain making like the Kentucky Derby. It is the most famous horse race in all of the land. Taking twenty, tall stallions from across this wonderful land and while they are whippped, poked and prodded, there are wealthy white men who are wasting their wages in an effort to look wise while wondering about their wives weird and wild wardrobes. It is wonderful.



See the thing about the Derby is that these women wear the goofiest hats. I don't get it. But if there is one thing that a rain maker knows it is this; when a shorty spends a lot of money to dress up, she wants to sex it up. It is a fact. The more money a lady spends on an outfit the more likely she is to put out.



So gents, after hitting that trifecta tomorrow remember to find the shorty who looks to have spent the most on her outfit. Tell her to forget about her husband and come back to your place. The odds are that she has had enough mint juleps to agree. This is when you have sex with her. It will be great.

I Really Need A Drink.

Sorry for the lack of updates this weekend. I was busy getting drunk and scoring bases. I know, surprise, surprise, right? Anyway, I really need a drink right now so all you, our loyal readers, get today is a youtube clip.



And for the record, yes, that man is a waste basket that the man is throwing his money into. I might as well do the same tonight, but instead I am going to throw it at a bartender while I get shitfaced.

Everybody's Got A Price.

The Million Dollar Man Ted Dibiase has no need for Sweet Saphire. His only need is to remind peons like Dusty Rhodes as to how rich he is.